ASSERTIVITY IN BUSINESS

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ASSERTIVIDADE NOS NEGÓCIOS. ASSERTIVITY IN BUSINESS.ASERTIVIDAD EN LOS NEGOCIOS
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A An assertive person when he makes mistakes, takes responsibility and goes in search of the solution without blaming other people. Assertivity in business, that’s the topic of our article.

Like many things in life, assertiveness needs to be lived in stages, for the assertiveness cycle to be virtuous, we have to follow some steps.

There is a lot of controversy surrounding the concept of assertiveness. It sounds incredible, but there are still many people who believe that assertive is “getting it right”; other people know the concept, but in practice, they act in an attempt to be assertive, choosing an aggressive posture, such as “too sincere” or a passive posture, such as “too nice”, that is, the aggressive person lacks empathy and the passive exaggerates the dose of empathy.

This confusion in the corporate environment is often caused by the organizational culture itself, which wants agility in results, but has a management based on “victimization and search for the culprit” and, on the other hand, requires an “assertive attitude” from its professionals in the problem solving.

So what assertivity in business? Assertivity in business means making a firm statement based on truth.. Being assertive is having the social capacity to express freely, with responsibility, self-confidence and respect, your ideas, feelings and expectations in different relationships, without beating around the bush, without embarrassment, without anxiety and without hurting the other.

Being assertive is having the social capacity to express freely, with responsibility, self-confidence and respect, your ideas, feelings and expectations. This is assertivity in business.

A person who has assertivity in business when he makes mistakes, takes responsibility and goes in search of the solution without blaming other people. Being assertive is saying and doing the right thing, to the right person, at the right time, in the right place and in the right way. This type of quality sets us in motion, makes us move forward in pursuit of our goals, strengthening our personal confidence and self-esteem.

Like many things in life, assertivity in business, needs to be lived in stages, for the assertiveness cycle to be virtuous we have to follow the following steps: facing the situation, achieving the goal, positive feedback and self-confidence to act again.

Assertiveness is an extremely relevant ingredient and generates positive impacts on trust between people and on building a psychologically safe environment for relationships.

What is interesting to understand is that assertiveness in business, is an extremely relevant ingredient for social skills that can determine the success of a professional and a company as a whole in today’s world, as everyone wins when we act assertively.

An assertive person when he makes mistakes, takes responsibility and goes in search of the solution without blaming others

As far as the business environment is concerned, the benefits are many: negotiators with a win-win vision, more effective conflict management, problem solving with impartial analysis of the context and situations, creation of an environment conducive to innovation and creativity, more lucid and impartial decisions, formation of a feedback culture in the company, more dynamic and healthy teamwork.

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In addition to all the aforementioned, we can also mention: emotional balance with a direct impact on objectivity and focus, streamlining of processes and actions focused on the solution, training people with critical thinking, impartiality in the analysis of context and situations , and last but not least, we can mention the team’s self-confidence and people’s courage when facing challenges.

We all encounter difficult situations along the way where we would like to say what we think and feel to a certain person. But most of us prefer to shut up and retreat so as not to create conflict, remaining in an apparent comfort zone. Others decide not to take it home, decide not to use their emotional brakes, end up aggravating the situation. But what can these two situations teach us?

Most of us prefer to shut up and withdraw so as not to create conflict, staying in an apparent comfort zone

The feeling we have is that we have lost our emotional autonomy, behaviors such as not expressing what you really think and want; always being on the fence in moments that require firmness in decisions; mistrusting everything and everyone, seeing things, situations and people with the bias of fear or excessive anger are reflections of defensive positions, because people believe and see human interactions as constant threats.

This is actually pure lack of assertiveness, which directly affects our emotional balance causing discomfort in our relationships, whether with family or work. It is up to you, then, to ask yourself some questions: Am I in control of my own life? Has what I’ve been planning to come true? What were the positive and negative impacts of the choices I made in the past? Am I consciously making decisions and choices? Have I been assertive or defensive in my relationships?

You will only know the impact of your past choices, looking at how your life is in the present, only by being aware of these choices, you will be able to change the course of your history for the better. Now, what makes a professional to be assertive or not, in the face of a difficult situation? What postures should a person adopt? How should we make our choices and make our decisions?

You will only know the impact of your past choices by looking at how your life is in the present

I ask you to imagine yourself in the following situation:

In the recent past, you were highly praised for your performance in achieving excellent results. However, you were assigned to a new project, but during development, you came across precarious conditions to succeed in your work, and sometimes, leaving you very insecure in its execution.

Even so, you tried your best without complaining about lack of information, lack of support from management, and errors in project configuration. You preferred to remain quiet, believing that you were correct in your “hands-on” posture. In the end, you received totally negative feedback, condemning your performance. You felt very bad, and then you thought about your image in front of everyone. You were pretty devastated.

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At first you felt a mixture of anger at the injustice, shame and fear of what they might think about you. How to act in this situation? You can choose two behaviors: be defensive or be assertive. If you act by unconscious choice, driven purely by a distressing emotion such as anger and fear, chances are you will choose defensive behavior and will certainly put yourself in the victim position.

If you choose aggressive behavior, it is likely that you will charge people for the damage they caused you through lack of information and poor performance. (attack strategy). If you choose passive behavior, you are likely to give up on the project, apologize for the poor outcome, and for not meeting your manager’s expectations. You may even resign as a way to escape the situation (escape strategy).

If you choose passive-aggressive behavior, chances are you’ll “hop on high heels” and make fun of people, hinting at how difficult it is to work with confused and incompetent people. You may even resign as revenge, wanting to show how superior you are to everyone else and that you don’t need this job. You know that phrase? “This company does not deserve me!!!” (dissimulation strategy).

You may not even realize it, but your reason will not be in control of the situation, but your negative emotions, especially anger. With anger permeating your perception, you will make reality totally distorted. You will arm yourself with defense mechanisms to survive your emotional pain, caused by the feeling of incapacity. I don’t mean that fear and anger are bad emotions, but they appear as a form of protection against your emotional pain.

You may not even realize it, but your reason will not be in control of the situation, but your negative emotions, especially anger

What I want to show is that, in a situation like this, fear and anger can easily hook you and lead you to a defensive path, where your reactions will be unproductive and will wreak havoc on your self-esteem, feeding it. with revenge, hurt, and biases that will deceive your self-consciousness.

Now, going back to our example, if you consciously choose to be assertive, you are likely to act as follows: You will assume that the situation has caused you total discomfort and will make contact with your anger, fear, and sadness; you will assess the situation to understand what happened, and take responsibility for your mistakes and understand the responsibility of others.

You will also need to prepare for an assertive confrontation with your manager, but how are you going to do that? First, have compassion for yourself by listing all the accomplishments you’ve already achieved to positively reinforce your self-esteem; second, you must accept that in this situation you made some mistakes caused by you and third parties; and third, you must think about alternative solutions to be negotiated with your manager.

What I want to show you is that in a situation like this, fear and anger can easily hook you into a defensive path

The negotiated solutions in this case can be: in the worst case scenario, you leave the project; in the best case scenario, you realign expectations and continue on the project with the support of the manager with a new alignment of your responsibilities. By doing so, you may have a new opportunity to change the course of your story and rescue your sense of competence.

Now most importantly, you must face the situation head on, you must meet with your manager for a decisive conversation, where you will be sincere in your position. He will assume his part in the problem and, without accusation, he will make clear the difficulties caused by his colleagues, and together, they will make a decision. In the end, you will feel great relief and pride in your courage to face a difficult situation with your head held high.

This conscious choice for assertiveness will strengthen your emotional resources, will give you resilience to face other risky situations, and will help you resolve what needs to be resolved. You will see that it pays to be assertive, so don’t waste any more time, start by mapping the situations and relationships in which you have been finding it most difficult. Evaluate your thoughts and identify those that are blocking your courage to take risks, create assertive strategies to definitively resolve these pending issues. Follow these steps, create a new story for your personal and professional life.

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Vera Martins is a master in communication, author of the books – Be Assertive and the Emotional Intelligent – both published by Alta Books, works as a mentor of leaders, coach and consultant in human development.

 

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